soma, the weekend of firsts

my oh my. what a weekend.

friday - drove down to tempe with dave and eve. as always, we had a great time. eve slept a lot, so dave and i entertained each other as always. we rolled into town about dinnertime, and met up with max, joanna, and brian. we had amazing pizza, and lots of laughter. before dinner, max was telling us about his migraine issues of late. i was worried. he'd been battling (ok, so you can't really battle a migraine, it wins every time) migraines for a week plus, and it showed no signs of letting up anytime soon. i've had migraines in the past, so i have an idea of what he was (and is still?) going through. i couldn't imagine how he was going to race a 70.3. the dehydration alone would be a recipe for disaster. he seemed cognizant of the option/potential need to sit SOMA out, but understandably reserved at making that decision. his commitment to the team was impressive already - when i used to have migraines, i would lock myself in my room and dare anyone to enter. yet there he was, at a very loud restaurant with 5 teammates carrying on as if nothing was wrong. it was obviously going to be a huge team building TNS weekend and i couldn't wait!!!

saturday - dave and i woke up to join 5 other teammates for a ride. since this entire weekend was prep for max's IMAZ next month, we had decided earlier in the week to do a lap of the IMAZ bike course (~ 35+ miles). about 10 miles or so into it, we dropped most of the 5, leaving brian, max and myself. i was bummed that we'd dropped that many, but they were all riding the next day for SOMA. i was bummed, but i was ecstatic as well - it was only my 6th ride on the ridley and i was so excited. brian and max were kind of leaving me behind, but i didn't care, nor was i surprised. i was having a pretty good time. i only had one bottle cage, not good. the course was mostly uphill towards the turn around, and you all know how i love hills. and hills in AZ are not even equivalent to hills in CA. not with dry wind. the heat wasn't bad, and i'd already shed my arm warmers. at one point, i'd decided that ride sucked. uphill, less than half a bottle of fluid left, and wind. not my idea of fun. and then came the turnaround. thank you jesus. the boys were waiting for me. we took a quick breather and then we were off. my what a difference a direction change makes. we were HAULING ASS. max was ahead, and even in my big ring i wasn't gaining on him. i don't have a bike comp yet, but i knew we were above 25mph. it was awesome. brian passed me, wasn't surprised. i came up to a hill and hammered it. so much fun. and then the world came crashing down. i was going down said hill at probably 28-30mph in the aero position. came up on 3 random pieces of driftwood (why the fuck is there driftwood in the middle of the damn desert?!). here's the exact order of my thoughts at this point:

- 'WTF is a damn tree doing in the road?' (3 separate pieces, one small, 2 big)

- 'oh shit, did i miss it?' (swerved around the small one)

- 'FUCK. nope.' (clipped it with my back tire - which flipped it into the 1/2 foot chunk directly in front of my front tire)

- 'CORRECT!!!! CORRECT!!!! PULL IT OUT!!!' (i must've come out of aero at this point, it's the only way to explain my injuries to my right hand - gripping the brake, and gripping it HARD)

- 'NOPE - CAN'T CORRECT. I'M FUCKED.' (more swerving)

- 'LAY IT DOWN ON THE LEFT!!!'

i landed on my back or on my left side, i think my left side by the time i stopped moving. i looked at my bike, it was facing the way i'd just come from. so weird because my left foot was still clipped in. i unclipped and ripped off my ipod and threw it on the ground. i was so damn pissed. a guy in a truck pulled over and got out. and a roadie rode up alongside me. i picked up my bike, they held it up for me. i looked back about 10-15 feet to where the driftwood was. i was so fucking pissed. i don't think i've ever had more hatred in my head for a single object in all the world. the guys held my bike up for me while i put my chain back on. my right hand was bleeding in a couple places, my arm was burned/shredded but i was shaking with so much adrenaline all i could think of was calling dave and getting back on the bike. the roadie and i folded down my right elbow pad so it was rideable again. the handlebars were leaning to the right, but i knew i could ride it still. the guy in the truck offered me a ride into town, but i refused. i asked the roadie to continue on his ride, but he refused. he said he wanted to ride with me for a little while to make sure i was truly ok to ride. nice guy. for the life of me i couldn't get my phone to work. it was the oddest damn thing. and so frustrating. we rode together for maybe a mile, where he turned off. i tried to call dave, twice, but he wasn't answering. so i called (and woke up) eve. i lost it at that point, freaked the fuck out mentally. she put dave on the phone, and i did my best to relay what had happened. i remember asking him to please just let me keep riding as long as i could. so random.

didn't want to call brian or max. i didn't think brian had his phone anyway, i knew max did. but it was max's training ride, his training weekend. i had gotten ahold of dave and eve, they were en route. i was safe, i was mostly functional, and my bike was ok. no need to worry them. i'd call them from the hotel.

i rode for as long as i could, until the height of the adrenaline rush died down and the pain set in. that took me to a very random 7-11 maybe 6-7 miles away from the crash. dave and eve were there maybe a minute after i got there. i lost it all over again. i wanted my shirt off asap for some reason. after i calmed down dave looked over my bike briefly. he reported it didn't look too bad, nothing that couldn't be fixed. i was relieved and calmed (somewhat) so we poured water over my arm to start cleaning. called max. he said brian had already looped back to look for me. we watched out for him but never saw him. then dave took a closer look at my bike. we made eye contact and immediately i knew he'd found something that meant the end of the ridley. i sobbed, out loud bawled for a second. dave knows his shit. that bike didn't even have 70 miles on it. it was my SIXTH total ride on it.

we loaded up, went back to the hotel and washed up. we had to get over to the packet pickup. i was already 90% sure i wouldn't be swimming in the relay, there was no way to make sure my open superficial wounds would be sealed and covered. and then we saw the water. nasty green with shit floating in it. negative ghost rider. my ass would NOT be competing the next day. somehow or another we managed to find a FAST replacement swimmer saturday night.

sunday - awesome. it was dave's first 70.3 and i was nervous but excited for him. i found THE perfect spot to spectate. the bike course is kind of like a three-pronged flower, all three prongs coming back to the center. i was able to post up in the middle of the flower. it was awesome. got to see dave for 2 of his laps, max for one, and joanna and susan for two. it was getting hot, and eve and i had wrapped my arm with an ace wrap that morning to keep it dust free. but the heat won. i unwrapped it, which maybe wasn't the best idea. direct sunlight on skin missing the top 2-3 layers is impressively painful. maybe not painful, but the sting is damn annoying. i played the 'hide from the sun with the left side of my body' game all morning. and boy was my outfit appealing. i didn't want to wear shorts, i had another pair of spandex that stayed away from my bruising. eve let me borrow a wifebeater that was 14 sizes too small but i didn't give a damn. i do now, after seeing pics, but i didn't then.

i saw eve on the run who said she wasn't feeling well. bummer. ran with max for a very brief section of his 2nd lap, he actually seemed happy! well, as happy as he could be at the halfway point of a half marathon after a 1.2 mile swim and 56 mile bike. i ran with dave who made jokes the whole time, that was exhilarating for me to see. at the finish i got to see brian come across with his relay team (Ger, a random international who found our team online and wanted to swim) and susan. next came max, much to my surprise. this meant he passed eve, a relay only girl, and a damn good runner. WOW!!! eve came across with that beautiful smile, as always. and then dave. who scared the shit out of me. he was running with his eyes all but closed. no facial expressions, nothing. i cried like a baby when i finally got my hands on him.

us smart folk finagled our way out of work on monday, so we had an additional day in tempe. we took our time getting home monday and enjoyed the trip.

to my shock and amazement, max was able to raise money from my team within hours to cover my insurance deductible. that brought me to tears. eve is always saying that you have your biological family, and you have your chosen family. that concept always made sense, but i've never really felt it until this weekend. this team, dave, eve and a few other people are my family. i can't even begin to explain how touched i am from the events that have transpired from that crash on saturday.

as for the ridley - he is officially totaled. as i type, he's sitting in the bike hospital awaiting organ procurement. most of the componentry we think is salvageable. the frame will definitely have to be replaced, the handlebars snapped back into the top tube on the left and cracked it all the way through. the aero bars might make it to procurement, but i doubt it. folding metal, and then folding it back down doesn't do much for integrity. we think my crank shaft and derailleur are all ok, but i emphasized the fact that it was laying on its right side when we stopped moving despite my attempt to lay it down on the left. my helmet is dinged and scratched so it's a goner. as for my injuries, they're superficial. i will heal. i'd yet to have a crash, i was due. this year i've put in so many miles on taunto, it was inevitable that i'd crash at some point. the fact that it occurred on my new baby, well that's just a bitch. we decided it's my own fault, never ride a bike that isn't yet named. so i will be picking a name for my new one soon.

all-in-all, a pretty damn good weekend. there are sections of it that i'd obviously change if given the chance, but since i wasn't given that chance, i can honestly say that i'm so thankful for the way everything turned out. dave and i are closer, eve and i are closer, my teammates and i are closer, i'm alive, i will ride again as soon as possible, and i will be starting my half IM training soon!!! can't wait to see what next year holds...

race report - los angeles triathlon

WELL!!!! now THAT was interesting.

when you have to get up 5 hours before you wave start time, that's not good. in fact, it's pretty much bullshit. waking up at 3:30am for anything, yeah, that's also pretty much bullshit. just my opinion...

so, we all three got down there (dave, eve and myself - aka the three amigos) and before the shuffle of the cars (2 transitions = logistical nightmare) we were able to get into T1 by 5am to rack our babies. AFTER the shuffle of our cars, we all got set up in transition. evey played the helper bee of the morning, assisting a teammate with her first triathlon transition set up. i bailed on her. i'm sorry evey, but i wasn't up for that job that morning. just wasn't. dave and i hung out around my truck, mentally preparing, bodily preparing...'nuf said. we gather up our wetsuits and head down just as the pros were starting out on the bike. we watched their mounts for awhile and then realize that we needed to get down to the beach. i'd heard the water temp was 68-69, sweet for evey. didn't really matter to me. and i'd noticed the wind. didn't put 2 and 2 together. we go back into transition and grab eve and our other teammate (who was not looking good btw). we walk to the peak of the beach and look out. utter chaos. HUGE FUCKING WAVES. dave and i bail on eve and teammate again. giddily we put on our wetsuits, we're just 3 year olds when it comes to big waves. we go out skipping. we dove for a little while. we'd dive another one, and i shit you not, after surfacing each and every damn time, there was an even bigger wave coming. i never even got in a single stroke to actually swim. it was relentless. i yelled at dave that i was going back in, i turn around, and there's an entire wave of black caps coming straight at us. i then yelled at dave 'oh shit, we've got racers coming!!!'. freaked me out a little bit! the start shoot was a good 50 yards south of us, we weren't in their space. it's at that point that i got pummeled. and by pummeled i mean flipped me upside down. good times. lost my googles, felt them suctioned right off my head. i popped up and saw dave, yelled that i'd lost my googles. we got to where we could actually stand and i spotted them floating. and then a wave came. and under they went. and luckily, they surfaced again. phew. took my cap off immediately, and put my googles on UNDER my cap. yep, it was gonna be that kinda mornin. great.

we walk up the beach just laughing, as usual. i wasn't really panicked at this point, i'd say it was more of a healthy shock/fear/amusement thing going on in my head. the first thought i had was that there was no way in hell that our newbie teammate would make this swim. not a chance in hell. so we go to the start shoot, talk to some friends and i keep looking out for evey. dave's heat was to go off right in front of ours, so it worked out well. we waited. and waited. and waited some more for dave's wave to go off. about 15-20 min later, i'd all but decided the swim just wasn't gonna happen. dave was in agreement. there was too much of a liability. it was fucking crazy out there. in our warmup fiasco we'd already seen them pulling one athlete out of the water, and that was IN FRONT of the break. and with no warning whatsoever, dave's group was off. they all ran out about 100 yards north because of the current. bad sign. we watched all his wave go off. well, by all i mean about 15% of them probably made it out within about 5 min. at the 10 min mark, there were still about 50% of them still trying to make it past the first break (yes, there were at least 2 breaks). wanna freak a bunch of women out, make them watch a shitload of strong yellow capped guys NOT make it past the first break. and then have one of them come back up and stand by the start shoot, HOLDING his yellow cap. good times. eve asked me if i just wanted to go grab some coffee. the funny part, she was just so matter of fact about it, but dead serious. i told her there was no way i wasn't going to try it. i told her i wanted to ride my new bike. granted, if we'd bailed on the swim i would've just done the last 2 legs of the race anyway, but the swim is the bridge in my world...but i will admit, i was pretty much to the point of scared by then. that's new. and standing there trying to half-assed talk eve into braving it with me, looking back, just too funny. we waited FOREVER for our wave to go off. and i mean FOREVER. and seriously, those yellow cappers just weren't moving. my mouth was just straight FOUL. i was cussing left and right. not that that's out of the ordinary, but with about 30 females surrounding me, i just assumed the class clown role. i've never seen these horrid looks on so many female faces at one time. hope never to have to again.

a lifeguard comes up drenched, and grabs the mic. he tells us there's a really really strong current, and that we needed to go out about 100 yards north to counteract the south moving current. BUT, we weren't to go any further north, because there was an equally strong current moving NORTH. excellent. rip is fun. good times for a fucking race. NOT. well, it is for people like dave and i, but we're just stupid. he told us not to run any further than the 2 lifeguard trucks parked on the beach. eve and i ran down the beach holding hands. not really sure why, i hope like fuck that damn lady from Nautica a couple weekends ago wasn't out there watching. for sure we're lesbians now if so. we go out and for some reason it was nothing. for me anyway. i just kept yelling at all the girls to swim like hell. i'm sure it didn't help, but the guards were all yelling at us the same thing too. there weren't a lot of us out there by the first buoy. didn't really occur to me. there was a lead pack, of which i had no concern. the water was so damn choppy, although choppy doesn't really explain it well. it was constant roller coaster. those waves were so fucking big. i got to the point that i just wasn't looking anymore. freaks you out a little bit to look in front of you and see another of your heat about 8 feet higher in the water at the peak of a wave. jesus. there were a couple times where i switched to breast stroke because i had to laugh. out loud laugh. it was comical. i can't explain it. at the turnaround i was worried the buoys were going to put us right on the first break. the current was so damn strong. it took me forever to reach the buoys. i had a head-on collision with a guy WAY off course from the wave BEHIND us. asshole. then one of the guards yelled that the orange buoy was the last one. i laughed out loud again. and then i hauled ass to that damn buoy. i reach it and start laughing again. and then i hear this screech of a scream 'CHARRISSSSSSAAAAA'. i turn around, it's my evey!!! i swam back to her and we hugged at the last buoy, just giddy. i told her this was going to be the tricky part of the whole thing, we had to time this right. famous last words. we couldn't see beach. at all. waves were too tall. so we just went with it. i don't think there was ever a lull. we just went. and then again, fucking mother nature handed me my ass. and this one was bad. the worst of my life so far. to my horror, one of em took me under and at one point my toes touched the back of my head. popped something in my back and i lost it. freaked out. couldn't surface. couldn't even figure out which way was up. i just clawed my way up. luckily my 'up' really was up. it wasn't that i was out of breath, because that i'm used to, i'm an asthmatic. it was sheer panic from the pain in my back. in my efforts to get to the top, i was kicking so hard that both my calves LOCKED UP in cramp. both of them. and of course i surface and there were waves just coming. i tried to ride them in, got sommersaulted again. finally made it to standing depth. looked at one of the guards and told him i was cramped, i needed help standing. he helped me up, and kept holding on to my arm. i told him to go get eve, she was 80 pounds, he needed to go get her. he did. she made it. i ran back into the water to hug her, she wrapped her legs around me and just laughed. yep, total lesbianism all the way. we were just in pure shock at that point. we kept saying over and over 'we getta ride our bikes today!!!'. retards. we're aware.

T1 wasn't a biggie. it was windy and cold, i knew evey would freeze so i yelled at her to dress warm as i was on my way out. got on and rode. proceeded to get gu all over me, all over my new baby. ah well. some of it made it into my mouth. saw my coach and a teammate who told me to ride faster and stop talking. i flipped them off. clearly they had no idea what we'd just been through. i rode with a girl for a little while, yeah, she never made it out past the break. shortly after this little revelation, i left her ass.

LOVE my new bike. it handles so well, even in the aero position. that was my big worry. i was afraid i was going to lose some of my handling ability while tucked in the aero position, but that's not the case so far. it was so easy to veer around potholes. i tried keeping track of those i passed, and those who passed me. by the time i hit the oly 2nd turnaround, my count was 10:5. 10 i'd passed, 5'd passed me. eh. whatever.

hit the turnaround, looked at my watch. wasn't too pleased. it wasn't an easy bike course. for anyone who said it was a flat course, they're full of shit. maybe until olympic it was flat. at olympic it was crap. and the wind!!! geez. hit the first turnaround and grabbed a bottle of gatorade. good shit right there. but where to put it? hmmm....i only have one cage, and it had my endurance. i didn't want to toss it, it was good. so i stuck it in the back of my shorts. that'll make for some great pics. heading back to the second turnaround was FUN. wind was with us, there's lots of downhills. i made some semi-racist comment to a guy about ramen noodles and koreatown. i swear i smelled ramen noodles. i prefaced the comment with 'i'm not a racist, but...' and i've discovered when you do that, yeah, you're probably still coming off as a racist. eh. whatever. what can ya do? it was funny.

so T2, yeah, it was at the top of a fucking parking garage. how smart is that? not so much. and they made us dismount BEFORE it even leveled off, we were still going uphill. morons. and what happened? OF COURSE a guy bit it, as did 2 others right next to him. i tried to swing wide so as to miss all of it, for once i was successful. and guarding my bike with my entire body i might add. i'm kinda proud of my new baby, what can i say? i tried to help the original fallen guy up, but he wasn't having any of it. asshole. last night i was reminded that when i did the same thing at santa barbara, i wasn't having it either. and i f-bombed the guy trying to help me. eh. whatever.

T2 wasn't bad. i wasn't about to let go of my gatorade. for some reason that damn gatorade was the best fluid i'd ever put in my mouth at that time in my life. it was just lemon-lime. i don't think i was dehydrated. i didn't down that much salt water in the swim. it just tasted good. the other crappy part about having T2 on the top of a parking garage, you have to run down the damn ramp. how cruel is that. you don't even have legs yet, and now you have to run downhill. morons. towards the end of the ride i'd decided that i was just going to do the 5:1 run/walk thing for the run. i'd had a good run this past week, only a three miler but it was easy for once. and i'd heard rumor of this big 'hill' on the run course. already knew i'd walk that sucker. so i run for the first 5, walk for 1. run for 5, walk for another 1. and at this point i think my watch was reading minute 12 of the run. i thought sweet, at minute 17 i get to walk again. yeah, next time i looked at my watch it was minute 34. i was shocked. and that 'hill'? that's no fucking 'hill'. that's a fucking mountain. jesus. ran up the smaller part of it, had to walk the big part. at the top was a water station, they had hammer gel. sweet. tried to slowly jog the downhill. i watched everyone else, everyone's stride was so long. i can't do that. heelstrike isn't good for my knees. so i tried to shorten my stride a lot, didn't help. alas i had to walk the downhill. i saw evey walking up the other side and asked her how the hell you run downhill. her response, 'honey, how the hell do i know? i'm walking the uphill!'. ah evey. i had seen dave when i was about to hit the uphill, and not knowing the course (one of these days i'll learn), i was keeping my eyes peeled for him again. he never came. then i realized he'd already made it through his 2 laps of the run course!!! holy shit he must've been hauling ass. i'd seen him on the bike twice, so i just expected to see him on the run twice. and then i rounded the corner and there he stood with some older lady yelling at me. he said something about beer at the finish line, not funny. not only was it not funny because it was a flat out lie, but also because i hadn't even started my second loop yet. the way the course went, the turnaround for the oly group was about 50 yards shy of the finish line. which is just mean. it's like oh, here it is. you see it? you feel it? yeah, it's not yours. turn your fat ass around. maybe next time...

evey passed me a couple blocks after the turnaround. can i just say how proud i am of that fact. i staved her off until lap 2 of the run. granted i'm pretty fast on the bike compared to her, but she's really fast on the run. i never really got tired. it was almost painful to walk at the drink stations to get down fluids. and i didn't feel like i needed to (drink) but i did just in case. on the last leg back in, i realized that i might actually make it in under 1:30 for the run. now granted, all of you reading this are now thinking 'WTF 1:30 for a 10K?!' that's ridiculous. i'm aware. but i'm slow. i'm painfully aware of how slow. might i point out, however, that in all my time spent on the pavement this summer, my farthest run was 4.7miles (although i still think i measured it, and measured it long, not short btw) and that sucker took me 1:15. this 10k took me 1:21. what's even better for me, aside from the climbs and descents, i only had to walk a max of maybe 4 minutes. that's counting drink station walking. at the finish line, i was so happy i was shaking. the three amigos were all in tears. ah endorphins.

all-in-all, we survived. after that swim, it just became a fun day. seriously. all competition went out the window for me the minute i actually hit dry land again. once we started milling around at the finish line, we were hearing just how many people never made it out on the swim. and there were TONS. pretty big ego boost right there. of course ego can't heal my pain in my back and my calves today. eh. whatever.